what_he_said Page 22

What he tweeted: SensorWake scented alarm should consider the smell…

SensorWake scented alarm should consider the smells of burning plastic and backed up sewage. cbc.ca/1.3390062 https://t.co/F3icotyxQo

Heating the house with wood on a warm day is challenging. The temperature swings between the surface of Mars and the surface of Venus.

This children's book has characters Mozart, Vivaldi, Monet, Galileo, and ...Mimi. Mimi, you get to teach my boys about white male privilege.

New Year's Day and once again I'm kneeling over the toilet. Just to rinse out a cloth diaper, but I can still pretend I went on a bender.

If you don't have any grand calendar-related festivities tonight, now would be a good time to step outside and look up. #yukon #aurora

Sorry to see Wayne Rogers died. No relation, but also spelled Rogers correctly without a D. Like Will, Roy, Ginger, Buck, Mister, Kenny,...

Shining a headlamp on it is clearly as close as you can get to eating it without getting into trouble. https://t.co/sJhEsrNc6P

What. The. Hell. #smarties #newpackaging https://t.co/1GgtSNKDbC

My brain is aware that «à le» & «de le» contract to «au» & «du», respectively. It just doesn't realize it until after I've said it wrong.

The baby can now climb anything regardless of barrier. So if he's going to kill himself, I just ask that he not raise my insurance premiums.

Wanted: shoes with retractable Lego studs on bottom. Walk around, pick up bricks, raise foot over bin, retract to drop pieces. #pleaseinvent

And with my patented Christmas Cookie Diet, you too can lose this much weight over the holidays! https://t.co/BmnNghDrjU